I am in heaven

25th January 2016

I wrote this post on Friday but wanted to save it until I was back The lanterns perfectly fill the tent with a calming ambience and the couple next to me sip red wine and chain smoke roll ups as I reluctantly put down my book and type this post. I came here to escape and everything in my bones wants not to be on a computer but I want to capture this feeling of utter peace, happiness and comfort in words. This is the first holiday I have taken where I feel like I have nailed luxury. I have been craving space and silence and I knew where I needed to go. The desert. The vast open space, still and timeless land.  This trip so far has been every bit of an adventure I hoped for. I have roamed cities and villages, shot and met some wonderful people, had my palm (and face) read and today began my hikes in the desert. Heartbreakingly the Polaroid film I had was void and a single shot was all I managed to saviour on my last sheet. Ebay can be cruel. Eli my driver collects me and I instantly warm to him. He is wonderfully laid back. Serenity so rarely seen in people. An inward calm. He is quiet but when he does speak it is poignant and harmonious.  I ask how he felt about his daughter recently fighting on the front line at the tender age of 20? Was he concerned? “No.” he replies softly with a soothing smile. “What will happen will happen. I have to let go of what I cannot control.” We spend most of the journey in comfortable silence until we arrive to pick up my guide from a small Kibbutz. He is the opposite of Eli. A loud American accent delivers information at a rapid and consistent pace. However, he is warm, hardworking and kind and clearly wants everything to be perfect for our trip, it’s overwhelming. After 30 minutes of walking my guide and I have a frank discussion. I decided to be open and asked if we could simply walk in silence. I explained I didn’t want to be rude but I wasn’t interested in the different types of rocks, the way the plants survive or how long the erosion had taken; I just wanted to walk, to see, to be – nothing more. I apologised for my ignorant and rude request but he smiled and seems un-bothered. I knew however at the edge of his lips were words that wanted to escape. By the afternoon he understood me, I think. It’s not that I wanted to be demanding or offensive but in honesty I wanted to roam alone; I just knew it wasn’t safe. (I get lost in car parks- the desert was sure to fuck me over) After a beautiful walk we arrived at the most stunning campsite. I took a shower and dumped my bags in my igloo mud hut and took a moment to admire the moon. …oao x